The Swim: The morning after.
Struggling with the tide I thought for a moment….. if I stopped, then I’ll always stop when the going gets tough.
Besides when you’re tired, you’ve only given 40% of yourself, my reasoning gained courage, I remembered a nugget and was proud.
I’m in training, the best habits are built now, at this point, after such a great victory, the inner voice emphasized.
I was witnessing a dual, Yin & Yang at work, It hit me that’s what the dual in individual comes from, two opposing forces in one body, both with equal capability to dominate. The choice….
Mortals with the powers of the immortal, but divided and thus weak wow…. I observed and kept pushing into the swim.
I asserted the power of the Immortal , I’ll shut down the suggestions urging me to stay in this place of comfort by pressuring myself, I thought.
Here we go, under the water I went, instantly depriving the comfortable me of air, the breath of life. I decided to make the weak me, pay for its weaknesses.
I knew this strategy would build rock hard determination. I began to taunt myself, “aww you must be tired, real tired, I continued in my taunt, and dove under again, then I said ok lets stop, I came to a standstill, ok, time’s up, come on, swim!
Get off your ass, I was determined to be unstoppable. After swimming for about 5 more minutes, all the urges were forgotten. I was so amazed, check this, only minutes ago I felt like I could not go any more, now I feel that I can’t stop, I had broken the will barrier.
I tried all sorts of stuff, I induced leg muscles cramp by over using my legs and to prove to myself that it didn’t phase me, I kept swimming, pulling my legs behind. I’d confirmed that as long as I did not panic, there was nothing to worry about.
I tested buoyancy, swimming with my head lifted and realize that my body would be less buoyant in that position, then placed my face back into the water and continued my swim.
I was so pleased with my success that I began to sing the Nat King Cole classic Mona Lisa, it was then I drank a mouth full of sea water and choked.
I jeered myself for my over confident complacency, I had clearly taken sides, live in the moment I reminded myself, the sea is no place for error, never forget it.
I understood, still, I’d still sing when it was safe to do so.
On the close of my swim I’d swam approximately 4000 meters, 10 lengths from pier to pier, my trust in myself had been expanded! .
I marveled with amazement because from one week to the other, I had gone, from not being capable of swimming 400 meters comfortably, to swimming 4000 meters nonstop and all that had changed was the boundaries of my fear…….